Play With Words

《最新情人书信写法》(The New Letter Writer for Lovers)是从剑桥大学图书馆塔(Cambridge University Library Tower)中整理出来的维多利亚时代书籍之一。书中教男读者如何向心仪但不熟悉的女士示爱：

Madam,

I scarcely can find courage to address you, and particularly as I cannot flatter myself that you have noticed me in any way. But, at the risk of incurring your displeasure, I feel compelled to express, with all deference, the anxiety I feel to become better acquainted with you, and to confess that you have inspired feelings warmer than those a mere acquaintance might warrant.

然后是女读者如何写拒绝信，如果你看不上他的话。只要把空填上就好了。

Miss ___ presents her compliments to Mr ___ and while she is unwilling to consider his letter an insult, she trusts that in future should she meet Mr ___ he will see the necessity for abstaining from addressing her under any circumtances whatever.

只要用心，什么都可以学。维多利亚时代也是个信息时代呢。

Kathryn Hughes: The secret love lives of the Victorians

Dominic Fifield of the Guardian reports the game between Arsenal v. Blackburn Rovers:

This may have been an uncomfortable victory, squeezed from Blackburn Rovers with the home supporters whipped up into a frenzy of frustration as chance after chance was squandered, but the reality of this team’s vantage point today will render the angst suffered by their followers last night forgotten.

体育报道也可以生动兼有文采。

Philip Howard of the Times answered the question:

Pasta pros (Italians) are adept at holding their forks in their right hands, and twirling spag into a nest. The safer British way is to use a spoon as a safety net beneath the nest. The boring British way is to cut the spag up into small gobbets. When eating à la Romana, do as the Romans do.

adept: very skilled; a highly skilled person.

我觉得用筷子最方便了。

Michael White of the Guardian comments on Peter Hain’s resignation:

Hindsight specialists were quick to argue that Brown’s failure to make him walk the plank in December – when the real scale of his initial £5,000 amnesia began to become clearer – is further proof of his indecision.

我喜欢这里的几个幽默的表达方式：

hindsight specilaist (“马后炮专家”似乎不如原文清晰和精彩)；

walk the plank 是指在船甲板上架起一块木板(plank)，伸向船外，然后让人从板上走过去，掉入海中，现在指被逼辞职；

£5,000 amnesia 指 Peter Hain 声称“忘了申报”的借口。

BBC 新剧 Cranford (2007) 中，充满着精彩片段和金言警句。比如第一集中的 ‘suck the orange’ 事件，以后将会成为电视经典镜头。

Mary: At home, we make a little hole in our oranges, and we suck them.

Miss Deborah: …

Miss Matty: That’s the way I like to take them best. But Deborah says it is vulgar, and altogether too redolent of a ritual undertaken by, by little babies.

Miss Matty: My sister does not care for the expression ‘suck‘.

Mary: ….

Deborah: We will repair to our rooms…and consume our fruit in solitude.

当然，演员的演出比上面的文字有趣得多。其中 ‘repair to our rooms’ 这个表达方式我还没有在现代语境中看到。

在 《泰晤士报》上，还真有读者询问如何 the polite way to eat an orange。《泰晤士报》“现代礼仪”栏目的 Pilip Howard 的回答是象削苹果皮一样把皮削掉，然后切成小块。读者的回答中，有一条据说是从中国人身上看来的：

I have seen some Chinese gentlemen eating oranges at table by using a sharp knife to cut them into four segments, from top to bottom. Each segmemnt can then be picked up in one hand and eaten easily and cleanly.

《卫报》的 Richard Williams 是体育评论员，他的分析文章有时候格外地准确。在英国拳击手 Ricky Hatton 在拉斯维加斯败给美国人 Mayweather 之后，他说为什么英国媒体和大众在各种赛事前总是保着不切实际的幻想。

Somewhere near the heart of all this is a misplaced sense of entitlement, the juice that fuelled both England’s failure in the last football World Cup and the clamour of Hatton’s fans in Las Vegas at the weekend. We are England, the chant goes up, and we deserve to win. The failure of successive disappointments to cool such ardour must be as fascinating for sociologists as it is rewarding for the industry that feeds off it.

ardour

Sky’s the limit to English failure in this land of hype and glory

在昨天的 Prime Minister’s Question Time (PMQ)上，保守党议员 Greg Hands 也来嘲笑 Gordon Brown:

With three different police investigations under way, two members of his cabinet … falling foul of the law, and his general secretary facing charges, is this what he meant when he called himself a ‘conviction’ politician?”

Simon Hoggart’s Guardian sketch: The cruel spectacle of Brown at bay.

Simon Hoggart described the shadow Home Sectary David Davis in his Guardian sketch:

Davis was not exactly discombobulated, but on the other hand, you could not describe him as entirely combobulated.

discombobulate 是来自美国的俚语，指 To throw into a state of confusion

有趣的是，虽然有 discombobulated，但很少见到使用 combobulated 这个词。

Gordon Brown used the word ‘passerelle‘ in his first Common’s speech after signing the new EU treaty in Lisbon. Guardian’s Simon Hoggart helpfully looked it up from an EU website:

…Instead it means “a word meaning a footbridge, referring to the possibility of either moving a policy area from the intergovernmental third pillar to the supra-national first pillar, or changing the voting rules in the council, or the extension of the article’s scope of application.”

No wonder we are not getting a referendum.

I have read the sentence three times. Still clueless.

昨天自由民主党(Liberal Demorates Party)的两个高层(副领导人和主席)一起在党总部门口宣布领导人 Menzies Campbell 已经辞职的消息，当事人却不见踪影。虽然事先已经告知，不会回答记者任何问题，但是在简短的公告刚刚结束，人群中立刻有人高声喊道：

Did you wield the dagger?

一切联翩的浮想似乎可以回溯到恺撒之死。

《卫报》(The Guardian)上的 Simon Hoggart 为我们作了生动的描述：

…Mr Cable, the deputy leader, came next. It was he who had announced yesterday that there was a “debate” about Ming’s future.

This is the political equivalent of the knife between the shoulder blades. Or even the machete into the skull. There must have been a bubble of rage in Sir Menzies’s throat when he heard that. “Et tu, Vince,” however, lacks a certain resonance.